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Entertainment RSS Feeds'Hancock' sparks $18.8 million Friday - Front Page: Sony, Will Smith film tops Fourth of July B.O. -- In its third day, Sony's "Hancock" reeled in $18.8 million, giving Will Smith his highest grossing B.O. for the holiday. ...Feed Source: feeds.feedburner.com Mamma Mia! The Movie - Film Reviews: "Take a Chance on Me" may be one of its most celebrated songs, but little risk is actually involved in "Mamma Mia! The Movie," a predictably glossy screen adaptation of the Abba-scored musical. ... German event shows 23 local films - International News: Cologne screenings run July 10-13 -- German Films Previews, the Teutonic film market taking place in Cologne July 10-13, will showcase 23 local pics, including Andreas Dresen?s Cannes screener ?Cloud 9? and Helma Sanders-Brahms? ?Clara,? about 19th-century composer Clara Schumann.... Box office fireworks for 'Hancock' - Film News: Will Smith, Sony film nets $17.1 million Thursday -- Will Smith and 'Hanock' soared for an additional $17.1million at the box office Thursday, raising it's cume to $41.3 million.... The End of Year (Yi nian dao tou) - Film Reviews: The lives of a foreman, a doctor and a high school prof touch tangentially during the frantic run-up to Chinese New Year in "The End of Year," a wry multicharacter ensembler that builds into an involving, very human portrait of everyday life in contempo Beijing. ... Mann moves up at EMI Music - Exec Shuffle: Jean-Francois Cecillon steps down -- The executive turntable at EMI Music keeps on spinning with news Friday that the company has appointed Billy Mann as international president, A&R labels, and David Kassler as president for Europe, the Middle East and Africa.
... Charles Wheeler dies, aged 85 - Obituary: BBC reporter worked in Asia, Germany, U.S. -- The BBC?s longest serving foreign correspondent, Charles Wheeler, has died. The 85-year-old reporter had been suffering from lung cancer. ... Sean Penn reaches out to SAG - Front Page: Actor urges Guild to vote down AFTRA deal -- SAG and AFTRA have made competing last-minute appeals to members over AFTRA's primetime deal, with ballots due back Tuesday.... Roberto Olla to head Eurimages - International News: Fund gives cash to Michael Radford film -- Italian Roberto Olla has taken over at the head of Eurimages, the European film support program. Previous topper Jan Vandierendonck resigned earlier this year, after just two years in the job.... Beeban Kidron joins UKFC board - International News: Appointment runs for four years -- British helmer Beeban Kidron, who directed ?Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason,? has joined the U.K. Film Council?s board of directors. ... Klosters to lead Fox U.K. video arm - Exec Shuffle: Exec joins from Leapfrog Toys -- 20th Century Fox has tapped Anders Klosters to become managing director of its U.K. home entertainment division.... BSkyB mulls move into Spain - Business News: Digital Plus a possible target -- British pay TV operator BSkyB is studying a bid for Spanish pay TV platform Digital Plus.... James Murdoch to speak in Munich - International News: Exec to attend Medientage -- James Murdoch, chairman and CEO of News Corp. for Europe and Asia, will deliver the keynote address at this year?s Medientage Muenchen media confab in Munich.... Hollywood posse rides into Europe - International News: 'Hancock,' 'Panda,' 'Wanted,' 'Caspian' arrive -- The European box office is expected to resuscitate this weekend with Euro 2008 soccer finally over, paving the way for Hollywood blockbusters ?Hancock,? ?Kung Fu Panda,? ?Wanted? and ?The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian? to kick off a full-force overseas summer onslaught.... Songwriters fight threat to royalties - Music News: EC told to leave system alone -- European songwriters and composers are lobbying the European Commission over proposals that could harm the royalties they earn from their work.... Russia sets up new film body - International News: New funding system to be introduced -- The Russian ministry of culture has established a new national film body following the sudden closure in May of the Federal Agency for Cinema and Culture.... Former Lovefilm CEO joins Endemol - Exec Shuffle: Valkin to lead digital operations -- A former CEO of Lovefilm has been tapped as Endemol?s head of digital media and new business. ... Venice plays host to freed hostage - International News: Ingrid Betancourt invited to be guest of honor -- Ingrid Betancourt has been officially invited by the Venice Film Festival to be the event?s guest of honor.... Premiere stock hit by soccer doubts - International News: Antitrust watchdog looks to broaden access -- Pay TV platform Premiere is bracing for bad news from Germany?s antitrust watchdog, which has signaled partial approval for the German Football League?s (DFL) ambitious marketing plans for top league Bundesliga soccer and, in a surprise turn, trained its crosshairs on the paybox itself.... INX nabs license to 20 Bond films - International News: 007 movies will air on 9X -- INX, India's recently launched broadcast group, has licensed 20 James Bond movies from MGM.... Singh takes TV role in India - International News: Politician replaces Swarup as minister -- The Indian government Thursday appointed Sushma Singh as the minister of information and broadcasting. She replaces Asha Swarup who was given a regional posting last month.... Tribune receives $300 million loan - Business News: 'Asset-backed' money in wake of Times layoffs -- On the heels of announcing steep layoffs at the Los Angeles Times, Tribune Co. said Thursday it had arranged a $300 million bank loan with Barclays Bank, most of which would be used to pay off part of an existing loan.... Paula's Secret (Paulas geheimnis) - Film Reviews: Nifty kidpic "Paula's Secret" handles strong stuff within a clever, frequently humorous tale.... A Short Interview With Ben Franklin - Benjamin Franklin was one of the most interesting and amazing figures of the American colonial period. This is a fantasy interview with him, designed to entertain and enlighten.... My Trip to the DMV - One of the first orders of business one needs to take care of when moving to California is to get a California driver's license and California plates. I had reserved a full day for this endeavor, anticipating that it would take at least the entire morning to achieve complete Californization of my vehicle and of all my vehicular activities.... Top 10 Ways to Tell Your Marriage Won't Work - The divorce rate in this country is at fifty percent. Don't become a statistic. Here are ten ways to help you decide, ahead of time, whether or not your marriage will work. Even if you are already married, this list can still help.... Shock Pranks, Electric Shocking Pranks - Are looking for a great prank? How about if you are trying to get back at your friend for playing a prank on you? Maybe you are just trying to be funny and enjoy playing a prank on an unsuspecting victim. No matter what the reason or occasion you are sure to find exactly what you are looking for in a shock prank. When you think of a shock prank your thoughts might go directly to a buzzer. True, this is one of the most common types of shocking pranks played on most, but there is a variety of different ways you can perform a shock trick without your target even suspecting it.... The Sherman Tales - Chapter One - TEFL For the Smart Kids - "Sherm the Worm does not Squirm" Act One Sherman, at eleven years of age, sometimes finds himself backed into a corner by larger, less intelligent children. One day, two bullies trap him on the playground and try to ruffle his feathers. Sherman remains calm.... One Woman's French Foly - Right upfront it has to be said that this is far from being a hard-hitting news piece. And what's more it'll probably only have a limited appeal bearing in mind that among the roll call of names are those that will only be familiar to the French, or French ex-patriots, Francophiles, Francophones and France-watchers. There again there are some that will strike a chord around the globe, so forgive the indulgence.... Pet Jokes and Animal Stories - My Top 15 Favorite - Whenever I get the chance I like to give myself a laugh or cheery thought. I started a collection of jokes that I find funny and sorted them by subject. I've picked out fifteen of my all time favorite animal/pet jokes and I'd like to share them with you today. So if you love cats, dogs, birds sit back, read, enjoy and feel free to share.... Celebrities & Other Animals I Met at the Zoo - I came to San Diego in the '60s without a job - and wound up working in their famous zoo, meeting both human and animal stars from Lassie and King Tut to Art Linkletter, Jimmy Stewart and the world-renowned "chimp lady" from Africa, Jane Goodall. Being close to Hollywood, many stars over the years donned dark glasses and popped in to visit our menagerie incognito, including Andy Griffith, Shirley Temple, Jerry Lewis and Cary Grant (who often stopped by when he was in town for a weekend of tennis). During my seven years as ... 10 Fun Ways to Annoy Beachgoers - It's summertime and you know what that means; a trip to the beach. Make your next trip to the beach a memorable one with these fun things to do.... Bye, George - A text message from my girlfriend early this morning told me the news that George Carlin had died. I immediately felt terrible and rolled back over, wanting to go back to sleep and not even think about the bad news until later in the day.... Ah, Candy and Memories - What Are Your Favorites? - I am now remembering one friend whose name was Motz. He was from Sweden. He introduced me to the "$1,000,000,000 chocolate bar". "Want to eat a million dollars worth of candy?",... Destination: Homosexual - Life is all predetermined. No matter how well you can do downward dog.... Humorous Buzz Words That Get Us to Pay More - Summer is fast approaching and companies are gearing up their advertising plans to convince us to spend more. It can be entertaining to listen to their buzz words. One of the buzz word phrases that have been around for a ... The Beer, the BBQ, the Bat! - My brother, Rick, invited me over one Saturday night for a barbecue and beer. His wife had gone camping with her girlfriends, so it was like our own boys night out. It threatened to rain, but that didn't dampen our spirits and we sat outside.... Life Can Be Funny - And Should! - Do we really need humor? How important is laughter in our lives? For many years, we knew humor was fun, and laughter made us feel better, but we didn't know the full story. Recent studies at University Of Md. Medical School point towards laughter being not just important, but pertinent to our health, job, relationships.... Top Ten Fourth of July Jokes - As far as holidays go, American Independence Day is just not as funny as Halloween, Christmas or Thanksgiving. I base this bold statement on the number of holiday jokes we get from kids. Halloween is the runaway winner, followed by Christmas and Thanksgiving.... Rufus, the Dog Who Went to Church - During the course of someone's career in the ministry, many interesting and unforgettable stories are experienced. Peter and his family would never have imagined that one of their most memorable stories centered on their dog, Rufus.... The Sacrificial Tuna - I love tuna fish sandwiches. My mother made me tuna fish sandwiches. Hence, I love my mother.... The Golden Rule - My first time in a gay bar. This story could also be classified under the category, "True Life Horror Stories."... Dying For a Vacation - Funerals have become so heteronormative. Let's mix things up!... A Fond Farewell - They said till death do they part. If only everyone took their vows so seriously.... Santa Clausowitz - Santa Clause has a secret. And it's not about his bowl full of jelly.... Delegate Your Work to the Temp - Ah yes, the temp; we've all held the title or been acquainted with this person at some point. These breed of workers are best known for their high tolerance for disrespect and canine style obedience to superiors. Since they are temps their state of mind tells them that everybody in the company is their superior.... Fair is a Place - Kids are always whining about how unfair life is. When I was growing up, I was told that "fair is a place where men go to throw cow pats to win prizes". I've also heard "fare is what people pay to ride the bus". Either way, the point is that life just isn't fair; at least not in the way we'd like it to be.... Wherever Two Or More Are Gathered - Driving to pick up my son from a friend's house this afternoon, I saw a group of men gathered in a yard. These men had fashioned a couple of small ramps out of plywood and some other odds and ends. The ramps were facing each other. At the time I was driving by, the men appeared to be standing around discussing how to utilize their creations. I saw this and I was reminded that wherever two or more are gathered there's bound to be trouble.... Recession Proof - What an extraordinary sense of freedom I had this morning after quitting my job. No thought went into my decision. The President has taught me that too much thinking can lead to indecisiveness.... Staying on the Funny Side - Of Kitchen Gadgets - Kelly's weekly hilarious column dives into the world of kitchen gadgets - those products we're convinced we need to have. Join us as Kelly embarks on a journey to purchase the Air Sucker 2000 - which she is convinced will change her life.... The Three Bears - Unplugged - Dad was a man's man and didn't really know that much about telling his kids bedtime stories. So, he would take the classics and give his own hilarious interpretations. As a belated Father's Day card, here's one of them. Mother Goose will never be the same.... Culture is Our Only Weapon - Now more than ever, we Iranian are appreciating our culture whole heartedly. We are now noticing that the only weapon we have is our culture. We need this weapon to fight the darkness that the enemies of happiness try to cover us with. We have got only our culture to survive with, to be part of the future, and to continue endlessly... Dance Moves You Shouldn't Get Caught Doing - No Matter What! - Havelock Ellis once said, "Dancing is the loftiest, the most moving, the most beautiful of the arts, because it is no mere translation or abstraction from life; it is life itself." That said, I'm betting my moolah the following dance moves, collected from various points in a 30 yr old guy's life aren't exactly what you'd call art nor would anyone want to get caught doing it.... Look For a Reason to Smile - Words and phrases such as office and corporate may conjure different sets of images and ideas in different people all over the world. However all of them have one thing definitely in common which is the thought of the mood and atmosphere that are generally connected or associated with a corporate setup or an office space. Description of such ambiance and the vibes being generated essentially varies from serious, stern, forbidding to extreme ones such as cold, aloof, unfriendly and even grim. But, what if lung bursting humorous material is concealed in the same space, which on giving a closer look will surely change people's ideas and notions about the office and corporate atmosphere and portray the gloomy interiors as full of rib tickling stuff that will make even a Laurel and Hardy episode tame beside it?... 10 Reasons Why You Should Never Pick Your Nose - Your mother told you this when you were two bricks and a sixpence high, but did you listen? She had a lot of reasons for telling you to never pick your nose. Maybe these are some of them ... Seven Guidelines to Use Humor in Sensitive Situations - Other sensitive situations, such as loss, crisis, illness, death, disaster, or disability also benefit from the proper use of humor. Not knowing how to respond to this type of humor can elevate the already high levels of stress and tension surrounding these circumstances.... How to Speak in South African Slang - The South African slang in this article has got to be one of the weirdest concoctions of language going. What with kief flatdogs I checked my Bru! Come learn the lingo!... New Airline Charges (Humor) - Due to increased fuel costs, airlines have been forced to cut back on some amenities, and charge for some services traditionally included in airfare. In addition to some of these changes, this list also includes some changes which, I have from reliable sources, are sure to follow.... Mad Ride Operator - Based on true stories about various unsavoury operators in the amusement industry. Unfortunately these people are seen as the true Carny not the clean, well organised operators who are the vast majority in our great business.... Sgt Slaughter, DDS - WWF great Sgt. Slaughter is thinking about a new career. Here's a television commercial script that he might do if he ever took up dentistry.... Why Flying Scares Me - Everyone has some kind of fear whether it be heights, bugs or rodeo clowns. Mine is flying. Find out why you may not want to be on the same flight as me, in this comedy monologue.... Of True Love and the Loss of Innocence - I used to believe in the Tooth Fairy, Santa Claus, a Just War, Righteous Politicians, Clean Non-steroidal Sports Heroes, True Love and the fact that Lemmings commit mass suicide by following each other off a cliff. So you can imagine my chagrin, my horror and my utter surprise to learn that the whole 'Lemmings metaphor' which I had heretofore always used as a reference for people who go along unquestioningly with popular opinion with potentially dangerous or fatal consequences is, yep, you guessed it folks, a myth, a fabrication, a lie of mammalian proportions. What other myths and fabrications might there be? And how does one remain true when cynicism rears its ugly head? Please read to find the answer ..... Stupid Product Labels - You've seen it, product labels that not only don't make any sense but appear to have been written by morons for morons. The problem is we're not morons. But instead of becoming angry at this direct assault on our intelligence, we use the one weapon we have that not only helps us keep our sanity in any situation, but makes life a whole lot more fun. And what weapon is that, you ask? Why, sarcasm, of course.... Top Ten Fourth of July Jokes - As far as holidays go, American Independence Day is just not as funny as Halloween, Christmas or Thanksgiving. I base this bold statement on the number of holiday jokes we get from kids at JokesByKids.com. Halloween is the runaway winner, followed by Christmas and Thanksgiving.... The Meet Cute is a Rom-Com Staple - Just in time for Valentine's Day, in a theatre review, I had a meet cute with "meet cute," that ubiquitous jargon term of screenwriters pitching their wares to producers. Actually, I'm lying.... There Are No Dirty Words in Korean - I learned to read at a younger than usual age (for that time, at least), and when I was still a child we moved for a couple of years to Morocco, where I learned to speak French (how fluently at age 7 is questionable). Instantly, my mother declared that I was a whiz at languages. I then learned enough Hebrew for my bar mitzvah.... 3 of History's Best Pranks - Mischievousness and laughter is a part of all of us. Everyone loves a comedian! We have genres dedicated to it, and many businesses thrive on making people laugh as well. People from all walks of life, all over the world, prank and joke each other every day.... Staying on The Funny Side of Weight Loss Secrets - Another weekly hilarious column about staying on the funny side of weight loss secrets. You'll never look at spam the same way again.... Federer Needs to Check the Deeds on His Property Portfolio (A Satirical View) - With the recent World economic downturn which has had an impact on the housing market it has come to light that Roger Federer has been inspecting his property portfolio. The business empire that has been built up over the past 6 or 7 years with many properties dotted around the globe is now under scrutiny.... Only in Portland - Maybe it's the weather, or maybe it's just a good day to be a little off. Some of it has to do no doubt with the fact that I work in mental health and these people fascinate me rather than worry me. Whatever it is, only here in Portland do I get to ride the bus downtown, and while waiting for the streetcar get to have a smoke with some guy who is homeless and schizophrenic tell me all about how he is planning on getting his middle finger cut off because a cat bit him.... Putting Meat on the Table - Life on a Texas farm was working, hunting and eating. Mother had a large garden and worked very hard to prepare the vegetables for eating during summer and prepare the rest for winter. Seemed like Dad spent his time working on the other crops, turning over the small hunting duties to me.... Childhood Memories of Reading on the Farm - Reading has long been a major passion of mine, starting at about four to five years of age. It didn't matter what I read, only that I read something. The Bible, labels on cans of food, Burma Shave signs, just anything.... Things You Don't Say to a Cop Down South - Wouldn't it be great if you could say what was exactly on your mind, without fear of recrimination? Enjoy this short play called, "A PSA From Dixie."... The Need For Sense of Humour in Life - What is life without a sense of humor? Man would be nothing but a reasoning animal without it. Many a life has been inspired by the ability to laugh in a tough situation and smile at the miseries of life.... If We Are "God's Instruments" - We Are Playing Out of Tune - The philosopher Karl or Groucho Marx once (and maybe twice) said that "Religion is the opiate of the people." No one had any clue what he meant. Until now.... Joke Writing - Anyone Can Write a Joke - Want to be a successful joke writer? Keep a pen handy and write it down.... The Day I Broke Up With Rachel Ray - I'm not speaking to Rachel Ray. She broke my heart. Find out how in this tearful account.... Clean Comedians Chicago - Having "grown up" in the Midwest as a stand up comedian and now as president of "Clean Comedians Chicago", I know that clean comedians in the Chicago area are a rare commodity these days. However, with the overkill of provocative comedy on cable television, they are making a comeback. Clean comedians in Chicago are ahead of the game.... Comedy in Manchester - Davenport Productions in Manchester are currently working on a new sketch show. The founder members of Davenport Productions are John Thomson (of Cold Feet fame), Chris Gascoyne (of Coronation Street fame) John Draycott and Andy Pope.... Stand-Up Comedy With Funny Man and Break-Dancer, Lawrence Leung - Lawrence Leung has been putting himself on the line as a live stand-up comedian for years and he's still only a young bloke. He has a keen interest in science too, so what do you get when you cross a comedian with science? A break-dancer apparently! Read for yourself his first-hand experience at being intelligently funny.... Orientation at a Nudist Colony - Have you ever wondered what it might be like to sit in a room full of naked people? Here's what an orientation at a clothing optional facility might be like, if Bob Newhart was the orator.... Texas Humor and the Things it Can Do - Texas humor is something that can make you look at the brighter side, more than anything else. The sense of humor Texas have is entirely its own.... The Way to Understand Texas Humor - Texas is popular for a lot of things. But of the many things that are famous there, humor tops the pack. Texas is a very big state. And the people from there pride themselves with all things big.... How to Live in Austin With Texas Humor - The state capital of Texas is Austin. It is the home of true-blooded Texans swearing loyalty to their state. But more than anything, it is the source of many Texas humor stories.... Texas Humor - How to Live it Up in Texas - The fifth biggest state of the U.S is Dallas, a city in Texas. And there has never been a doubt about Texans loving their cities. They tend to be protective of who they are and what they have for all it's worth.... A Dose of Texas Humor For You - Everyone requires a little bit of humor to spice up life. Life without humor is dull and worthless.... 10 Movies You Don't Want to See - Most movie sequels are never as good as the originals and now they are waiting decades before making them. Here is a list of ten we hope Hollywood will never make.... Best & Worst Pick Up Lines - If you're still stuck in 1978 and using pick up lines, then this one's for you. For everyone else, have a few laughs on us. Here in no particular order are some of the best & worst pick up lines (use at your own risk).... An Open Letter to All Mother-in-Laws - Don't you know guests are WORK? Give me my peace when I ask for it!... International Slap Your Workmate Day - My candidate is an Information Technology geek. What do IT guys actually do on a day to day basis? When all computers are working perfectly and the networks are fixed to perfection? They browse and chat that's what. I mean, how many times can you fix a network or service them hard discs?... Losing Yourself in the Middle of a Conversation - There's a well-known saying that goes, "Wherever you go, there you are." It's a good saying except for one thing: It's just not true!... A Shivering Reminder Of WWII - Yesterday morning, I was toweling off after a shower when I begin shaking and shivering uncontrollably. With great difficulty I managed to get some clothes on and made my way to the indoor patio. Shirley brought tons of covers which while they didn't stop my shivering, were certainly welcomed; most of the shivering came from within, hello hot tea!... Does Candy Have a Place in Nostalgia? - What is the definition of nostalgia? According to Webster's, it means "a longing to go back to one's home, homesickness" or "a longing for something far away or long ago". Or how about this one - "longing for former happy circumstances".... Who Does Obama's Hair - Fire Them? - Look, I have no love for Senator John Edwards, the trial lawyer who wanted to be President, but at least he looked like a preppie type on stage. Why? I suppose it's because he pays $600 for a haircut. But then I look at the fact that Senator Edwards endorsed Senator Obama for President, but Obama's hair stylist, well quite frankly if he does have one they suck.... Back at the B Western - Few people appreciate the great contribution the handgun has made to television and motion pictures. What would police shows, for example, be without .38 Specials and .357 Magnums? Imagine police detectives standing around the squad room in shirtsleeves, rifles dangling from under their armpits. Ridiculous!... The Judas Manual - Our recent history has accumulated a record of botched initiatives, uncertain situations and tragic episodes that have led the United States into the road to decadence, universal scorn and national misery. It must be admitted that those responsible took advantage of the ignorance and naiveté of a good half of the American people in order to get elected not once but twice! As we come to the end of this fateful period, we begin to notice the appearance of what can best be called home grown Judases that prey on their protectors, friends and ... The Souvenir Smashed Penny Collector - The Souvenir Smashed Penny Collector Finds Joy For a Penny. He finds adventures and sights along the way. Follow his trek.... Get Your Aunt Fanny Kicks - Childhood memories of my Aunt Fanny haven't faded away. It is like a perpetual mental haunting of a crazy woman. I'm writing a series of articles about her as therapy. Maybe one day, it will be the basis for my book.... 3 Ways to Spot a Tourist - It's vacation time again and if you live in an area where tourists invade your sanctity, there is help. Here are three ways to identify these fun-seekers.... My Life Story on The Big Screen! - When the final chapter in my life's story has been written and work on the screenplay for the movie begins, someone will be faced with the difficult assignment of deciding who will play me on the big screen. It won't be an easy task because it will take an actor of the first water to capture the true essence of me. My life has had the same assortments of successes and failures, tears, both of joy and of sorrow, grand excitement and heart-rending disappointments as everyone else in this world.... Befriend The Janitor In Your Building - You should befriend the janitor. He is the only sane one in your building.... Find The Perfect Coffee To Pair With Dad's Style - Father's Day Gift - Much ado nowadays pairing gourmet coffees with matching desserts, or chocolate varieties. We've discovered something new for you to pair. Why not pair a premium coffee with the unique and individual personality of someone you care about.... My Family Trade Mark - Noise pollution is an issue of great concern in our family of 5. My grandfather lost the normal sense of hearing during the war in Vietnam by one very close explosion, how close ? Well you can have a fair idea by this example that a strong sound wave of maximum pitch and magnitude through proper medium like air can not even vibrate a little of his ears.... Hector Berlioz And The Train Wreck - The premiere of the Requiem by the great composer Hector Berlioz was almost ruined by an enemy conducting the orchestra, who calmly took a pinch of snuff instead of conducting at a crucial juncture. This great moment in music history is said to have given rise to the musician's term, "the train wreck," wherein a large force of musicians stumbles at the same moment and a piece of music has to be stopped due to mass confusion.... Why I Hate A Cellphone, And What I'm Gonna Do To It - If you hate a cellphone as much as I do, you'll enjoy hearing what's gonna happen to mine! After all the suffering this device has put me through, it's payback time!... Laughter Is My Business - Make It Yours Too - I remember loving to laugh as a child. My mom was the "sense of humor proprietor" of our home, and making her laugh, was especially fun, as she was a tough audience. Especially when I was in trouble, which was a majority of the time.... Beethoven's Bad Mood - Great composer Ludwig van Beethoven was known for his cantankerous household habits. During his lifetime he moved dozens of times, often the result of a dispute with the landlord. Beethoven was known to play the piano loudly, and many complaints were registered by neighbors about the great composer's strange hours.... Children Smoking In The 1930's - My Mother was a Saint; she must have been to have put up with me and my smoking. Yeah, I was a hard core smoker when I was around 11-12 years old. Cigarettes?... Was Mozart Murdered? - Inspired by the film AMADEUS, many people have heard the rumor that the great Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart may have been murdered in 1791. Here are some curious facts about Mozart's final days that are not well known, and which completely contradict the theory that Mozart was poisoned by rival composer Antonio Salieri.... Pre Memorial Day Musings - The 'until 40' thought helped me immensely back then;however, the year I turned 40 was a bit uncomfortable, especially when my new company car that year was a coffin colored bronze. Is there a bit of superstition in each of us?... Memorial Day Humor - This is a funny look at Memorial Day parties and gatherings! Have a wonderful Memorial Day!... Get Your Aunt Fanny Kicks Here At The Sarcasm Cafe (While Supplies Last) - Childhood memories of my Aunt Fanny haven't faded away. It is like a perpetual mental haunting of a crazy woman. I'm writing a series of articles about her as therapy. Maybe one day, it will be the basis for my book.... Thai Wives And Girlfriends - A Few Stories - The things Thai wives and girlfriends do to their western partners are often a source of amusement for those not affected. Here is a small selection of stories.... Commuting - As Old As The Wheel - Commuting. The very word conjures up visions of frustration and long lines of vehicular madness.The idea is as old as man, even predating the invention that is responsible for our present state of insanity.... How Do You Fix Stuff Without Losing Your Mind? - Fixing stuff yourself can be a satisfying thing, if you are ridiculously lucky and nothing goes wrong. Yeah right! What are you smokin' dude!... 10 Things You Should Never Say To Your Wife - Do you like the outdoors? Love to lie in the snow in your boxer shorts at night? Like the ice water running through your hair? Ok, say these things to your wife and she'll throw you out there!... Why You Really Need Quantum Theory - Quantum theory can be really useful round the house. No home should be without it. But you need to get to the speed of light. I will help you with this! Read on for speedy enlightenment.... Prices At The Pump Are A Gasly Problem - The price of stamps rose two cents on Monday, but this news has been completely overshadowed by the fact that gas is running at a national average of $3.71 per gallon, which is 35 cents more than it was just a month ago. My initial reaction to this statistic was, of course, "In your face, stamps! I hope you don't want my two cents, stamps!" But then I realized that the rise in price is actually a bad thing, so I apologized to my stamps by mailing a lot of letters to myself.... Wash Your Hands Before Flushing - Please - Google "What is the average age for potty training?" as I just did, and the first result that comes up is something from the University of Michigan Health System. Now, originally I thought, "Well, what does the University of Michigan know about the toilet?" but then I remembered that is where its most recent football season went. According to an article on the site, the average human is ready for potty training at the age of 24 to 27 months. It is assuring to know that in terms of our own waste, we are only 24 to 27 months behind cats. But that's okay -- we're better than cats in other ways. For example, we can create funny commercials in which we make it seem like cats are singing when in actuality they are not. Yes, we sure do have an advantage over those cats!... Benefits Of Laughter - Laughing is the best medicine. It will help you to make it through anything. Wherever you go and whatever you do, be sure to keep your smile on!... The Rules Of Cricket - The rules of cricket take some explaining. Pay attention now while I try and get all my ducks in a row.... Rubber Duck Trivia - Did you know that most rubber ducks aren't made of rubber? Or that Queen Elizabeth II had her own rubber duck? Learn more about rubber duckies!... Chicken In Malay Idioms - Learn to speak Malay by calling a Malaysian guy chicken. Rest assured this is not an insult. If you don't know why, come and take a lesson from the chicken which often appears in Malay idioms.... Copyright © 2008, Real Estate Investment Tips. All Rights Reserved. |